Remembering My Brother, B-Free
I'm struggling this morning because I lost my fraternity brother to a long hard fight against cancer. I can't say I was surprised but it's something about the finality of death that hits you like a ton of bricks. Byron had struggled for so long and always beat the odds so it seemed as if the last week were but a dream because he was so strong and was always pulling through the worst with flying colors! So, while sitting in church, hearing my phone vibrate, I wasn't prepared to see that he had finally taken his last breath. With all the preparation that I had put myself through, all the feelings of anger, disappointment, frustration, the questions of why him and not me (the same exact feelings that I went through when my frat brother, Kevin passed last year), all these questions rushed to the forefront of my mind and I really had no answers...
I didn't know what to do but I knew I needed to leave service to gather my thoughts and "get myself together." While doing so, I went and got my sands out of service to make sure he was aware of the situation and we instantly began to reflect on Byron and his strength. You see, there is a serious lesson to be learned in all of this that I can't help but share. (I'll try to do this without shedding tears, so let's see how it goes)
In life, no one is guaranteed tomorrow so it's important to make each day count! No matter the circumstances, Byron was never known to complain, he kept pressing through and still maintained a "good" face for us. I believe with my whole heart that he did that for his family and fraternal family and for others who were watching him from a distance. Having experienced his father pass away due to cancer, I'm sure that it was in the back of his mind that he was not going to allow cancer to alter his life in a way that he wouldn't be able to live!
It's amazing that very few of us will ever understand the pain that he was in but will live a life that is less flourishing than his was because we don't appreciate the life we have before us. As I stated earlier, life is not guaranteed. As I'm writing this now, in another hour I could be gone as well, so we can't spend time complaining and talking about what ifs and stuff like that...It does no good! We have to make it count and it has to matter that we were born! Life is something to be lived and not wasted away with complaining and petty bull...
Yes, the finality of death hits hard because one thing that I couldn't handle is seeing my brother in all the pain that he was in. But, being honest, as much as I wanted the pain to be done and over with, I held out hope because he ALWAYS pulled through, so the finality of hearing that he was finally gone hit me REAL HARD!
So, what else is there to say but so long B-Free, you were a true soldier...You fought a good fight, kept the faith and have now finished your course. You are now resting with your father and the many others who have gone on before you. We'll miss you but you will NEVER be forgotten...Until we meet again!
posted by Pastor Rich at 7:06 AM
4 Comments:
I don't know how to feel right now I have tears in my eyes. When I read that Bro Freeman has passed on it made me think of his positive attitude. Before I moved
to Las Vegas I saw him at Walmart and even though his words were almost inaudible he was in good cheer. We talked and shared a few laughs. I knew that would be
the last time I would see him alive. He did not complain he simply said "I'm still alive" Imagine that...all the pain and struggle and he was happy to
breathe Gods air one more again.
Please get me info where I can send a card to his family. My thoughts are with the brother of Alpha Xi Lambda always. The warmth and receptiveness that I received were like none other that I have experienced. I miss all of your faces and spirits dearly I really
do.
No matter what Rev. you keep keeping on with your weekly writings you are changing lives and with that God is pleased. Continue to be the voice of the
unheard continue on to be the voice of youth. You are doing a good job and God will continue to bless your efforts. No matter how tired you get and you think no
one is reading remember this. You helped me I read your your writing and I was in a dark place personally. Those reading in the summer of 05 helped me soo much. I was down and your words of encourgement lifted my down trodden spirit. Never forget with ever text that you write through God you are helping people and changing lives!!!!
Lord willing I will see you in D.C. I just had to get it off my chest B-Free a lovable young brother who lived his life the way he felt he needed to. May God
bless his spirit as he enters into the Kingdom of Heaven.
Until we meet again take care and God bless you and your family.
Fraternally Yours, JJ
Yes, the finality of death hits hard. So hard you can't prepare for it, even if you have someone on death role knowing they will be executed tomorrow, util they actually take their last breath they are not gone.
I'm saying all this to say I thank God for his presence, because it is He we must find our confort in.
Always remember that it is not that he allows bad thing to happen, but he is with us all the time all the way through.
Bless you, He will keep you.
E
Great Blog...I'm crying myself after reading this and never even met your brother. Thanks for sharing! Thanks for keeping it real.
I did not know this Brother personally but I will say that this outpouring of love has touched me to the point of tears.
As I was directed to read this BLOG by my Fraternity Brother James Jackson. I find that it is a shame when the only thing that makes us realize how valuable life is, is when someone is taken from us too soon. I am ashamed to say that I am one of those people. As much a I always say to myself, "I will not take life for granted this time", I always seem to sink right back into that pattern where bills and deadlines consume me more than smelling life's roses.
There is a saying that youth is wasted on the young, sad but truly this resonate in me because it is not until one has lived life can one accept and treasure all that it has to offer. It seems to me that this young man tried to live life to its fullest, even though he was not dealt the best hand. I am so happy that his life has been a beacon to so many people including myself. I have never known him but his life has helped me know myself a little better. May peace be with him..
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