Embrace the Change
I'm at a place where I really can't put into words what I'm feeling, but I'm going to attempt to do my best...and still I don't think I'll be able to say it like it really is! I'm tired. I'm tired more now than I've been in a long time. I don't know what this is related to but whatever it is...I wish it would leave. No…I know what it is, it's me.
Let me explain it like this...now that I'm transitioning and typing to a world of people, I feel very different because I'm not in control of who reads this. I'm not in control of any responses and this is the first time that I've been in this type of arena...talking to a group of people that I really can't see! I want to scream right now, but I can't. I want to walk away from all of this, get on a plane and kick it on the beach, but there is work to be done. Finally, when the weather has finally come to a somewhat decent state where I can really enjoy myself, I have found myself angry for no reason. At a time when there is so much to be excited about, I'm still yet longing for the way things used to be. The seasons have changed and I have to learn to appreciate and embrace the changes that have taken place...although I really don't want to. (I'm keepin' it real ya'll)
We as beings don't like change...well, let me keep it personal...I DON'T LIKE CHANGE! It's hard for me, but at the same time that I'm confessing that I don't like change, the other side of me, and the pastor side of me knows that change is good! The Richard side of me wants to go back to the way things were, understand that? But the same body, but a different title that resides on the inside of me knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that change is needed and change brings refreshing! While Richard could care less, the gifting of God that resides on the inside of me has to overpower the flesh in me that wants to keep things at status quo.
I can now do some things in this season that I couldn't do in the last season. I can now put my coats and sweaters up...FINALLY, because the season has changed. I can't take the clothes I wore yesterday into my today. Why? Well for one, I'd pass out! How stupid would I look in 80-degree weather wearing a turtleneck, sweater, and a coat? You would think that I need to be admitted to an insane asylum or something.
Well, I don't like this new season because I have realized that there are some people who aren't with me any longer. They were with me for the past few seasons of my life...these were crucial seasons and I needed them but now God has released them and has separated them from me. AND I DON'T LIKE IT! Now before you jump to conclusions like these may have been bad people or something...No! These were close covenant friends that would have my back in the heat of battle at a moments notice. And now I have found myself alone. The thing I feared the most...being alone...has now become reality!
I have to remind myself that God wants to show me something great...and He couldn't allow me to get distracted by focusing on relationships in this critical time in my life...but it's still hard. I know that God is with me...to protect me...to save me...but I still have to deal with the longings of my soul. What I wouldn't give to be in the last season...but at the same time I want to know what awaits me in this season. Shoot! I didn't go through all the hell and drama to get here to sulk and complain and miss this moment! God moves from glory to glory which means that He gets better and better. Now, if He was good to move in the last season...then He will exceed His greatness in this season!!! And as lonely as I am...I can't wait to see what He has in store for His elect!!! Can you?
I proclaim today...It's a new season...new day...fresh anointing coming my way. A season of power and prosperity. A new season has come for me!
Let me explain it like this...now that I'm transitioning and typing to a world of people, I feel very different because I'm not in control of who reads this. I'm not in control of any responses and this is the first time that I've been in this type of arena...talking to a group of people that I really can't see! I want to scream right now, but I can't. I want to walk away from all of this, get on a plane and kick it on the beach, but there is work to be done. Finally, when the weather has finally come to a somewhat decent state where I can really enjoy myself, I have found myself angry for no reason. At a time when there is so much to be excited about, I'm still yet longing for the way things used to be. The seasons have changed and I have to learn to appreciate and embrace the changes that have taken place...although I really don't want to. (I'm keepin' it real ya'll)
We as beings don't like change...well, let me keep it personal...I DON'T LIKE CHANGE! It's hard for me, but at the same time that I'm confessing that I don't like change, the other side of me, and the pastor side of me knows that change is good! The Richard side of me wants to go back to the way things were, understand that? But the same body, but a different title that resides on the inside of me knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that change is needed and change brings refreshing! While Richard could care less, the gifting of God that resides on the inside of me has to overpower the flesh in me that wants to keep things at status quo.
I can now do some things in this season that I couldn't do in the last season. I can now put my coats and sweaters up...FINALLY, because the season has changed. I can't take the clothes I wore yesterday into my today. Why? Well for one, I'd pass out! How stupid would I look in 80-degree weather wearing a turtleneck, sweater, and a coat? You would think that I need to be admitted to an insane asylum or something.
Well, I don't like this new season because I have realized that there are some people who aren't with me any longer. They were with me for the past few seasons of my life...these were crucial seasons and I needed them but now God has released them and has separated them from me. AND I DON'T LIKE IT! Now before you jump to conclusions like these may have been bad people or something...No! These were close covenant friends that would have my back in the heat of battle at a moments notice. And now I have found myself alone. The thing I feared the most...being alone...has now become reality!
I have to remind myself that God wants to show me something great...and He couldn't allow me to get distracted by focusing on relationships in this critical time in my life...but it's still hard. I know that God is with me...to protect me...to save me...but I still have to deal with the longings of my soul. What I wouldn't give to be in the last season...but at the same time I want to know what awaits me in this season. Shoot! I didn't go through all the hell and drama to get here to sulk and complain and miss this moment! God moves from glory to glory which means that He gets better and better. Now, if He was good to move in the last season...then He will exceed His greatness in this season!!! And as lonely as I am...I can't wait to see what He has in store for His elect!!! Can you?
I proclaim today...It's a new season...new day...fresh anointing coming my way. A season of power and prosperity. A new season has come for me!
posted by Pastor Rich at 9:00 AM
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